Communications | Atomic Tango

Entries Tagged as 'communications'

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August 15th, 2009 · No Comments · Uncategorized

Buy Cloxazolam Without Prescription, "Next to analysis, communication skills must count among the most important for future masters of the universe. To their credit, buy Cloxazolam without a prescription, Buy cheap Cloxazolam, business schools do stress these skills, and force their students to engage in make-believe presentations to one another, Cloxazolam pharmacy. Buy Cloxazolam online cod, On the whole, however, rx free Cloxazolam, Buy Cloxazolam from mexico, management education has been less than a boon for those who value free and meaningful speech. M.B.A.s have taken obfuscatory jargon — otherwise known as bullshit — to a level that would have made even the Scholastics blanch, order Cloxazolam online c.o.d. Order Cloxazolam no prescription, As students of philosophy know, Descartes dismantled the edifice of medieval thought by writing clearly and showing that knowledge, where can i buy cheapest Cloxazolam online, Rx free Cloxazolam, by its nature, is intelligible, buy cheap Cloxazolam, Australia, uk, us, usa, canada, mexico, india, craiglist, ebay, not obscure."

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October 28th, 2008 · 2 Comments · Random Observations

Clonazepam For Sale, by Freddy J. Nager, Buy Clonazepam online no prescription, Founder of Atomic Tango LLC + Part-Time Shark Jumper

Despite an economy that resembles roadkill, America still excels at media, including entertainment and news, where can i find Clonazepam online. We give good hype, Buy cheap Clonazepam no rx, and the Internet brings it to the rest of the world 24/7. One problem: all this unfiltered Yankee content poses a linguistic challenge for people in other countries, even those fluent in English, buy Clonazepam from canada. That's because Americans also excel at screwing with the language -- and I'm not just talking about Miss South Carolina (warning: excruciating cringe-inducing video ahead)...

This occurred to me during the last Presidential election: "Joe Six Pack," "Drinking The Kool-Aid," and "Voted Off The Island" were just a few of the news expressions that might beguile someone who wasn’t raised in America, who doesn't keep pace with our popular culture, or who's a Presidential candidate over the age of 70, Clonazepam For Sale. Buy Clonazepam online cod, So as yet another friendly Cool Rules Pronto public service, here are 10 expressions you should know. (Note: I'm not attempting to chronicle all slang in existence -- that's what Urban Dictionary is for, buy Clonazepam without a prescription. I just selected odd terms that have become so commonplace that they appear in newscasts.)

Joe Six Pack: In America, Clonazepam price, beer is often sold in bundles of six cans. It's usually the cheapest of beers, and it's easy to carry one bundle in each hand, order Clonazepam online c.o.d. Clonazepam For Sale, Hence, for working class American males --- many of whom are named Joe -- thirst is not quenched by an elitist glass of wine, but by a couple of six packs from a convenience store. Interesting side note: someone with well-defined abdominal muscles is said to have "six pack abs" because of the way they appear, Order Clonazepam from mexican pharmacy, but most Joe Six Packs have bellies resembling kegs from all that drinking.

Soccer Moms: Joe's counterpart in this election is the Soccer Mom. (Sarah Palin changed it to "Hockey Mom.") Soccer Moms are middle-class white suburban women who can afford to skip work and take their kids to soccer practice, buy Clonazepam from mexico. They're usually pictured driving monstrous vans or SUVs. Soccer Moms and Joe Six Packs rarely mingle outside of election rallies, Clonazepam For Sale. Order Clonazepam, Switftboat: In the 2004 U.S. Presidential election, a hitsquad of veterans who served on Vietnam swiftboats with Senator John Kerry slandered his military record, online buying Clonazepam. Kerry failed to defend himself against their attacks, Australia, uk, us, usa, canada, mexico, india, craiglist, ebay, and his subsequent loss is widely attributed to this "swiftboating." Today it refers to any particularly heinous attack on someone's character or reputation.

-Gate: Since Richard Nixon's Watergate scandal of 1972, many scandals have been nicknamed using a word combined with "-gate" such as Troopergate and Plamegate, buy Clonazepam without prescription. Clonazepam For Sale, There's no logic to this, since "Watergate" was just the name of the office complex that Nixon's men broke into. But logic is not part of American language -- or American politics. Buy no prescription Clonazepam online,
Drinking The Kool-Aid: In 1978, cult leader Jim Jones persuaded 907 members of his Peoples Temple in Jonestown, Guyana to commit suicide by drinking Kool-Aid (a sweetened beverage) laced with cyanide, buy Clonazepam no prescription. I'm certain that Kool-Aid brand managers are not happy with this association, Buy Clonazepam from canada, since there's no proof that the sweetened punch was actually Kool-Aid, but pop culture can be brutally unfair. Since then, where can i find Clonazepam online, "Drinking the Kool-Aid" has referred to the act of believing anything a leader or group tells you, Buy no prescription Clonazepam online, without questioning its truthfulness.

Hail Mary: In American football, a "Hail Mail" is a play of desperation, in which a quarterback throws the ball as far as he can in slim hopes that a teammate will catch it and score a touchdown, Clonazepam For Sale. It's a very risky play with little chance of success, and is usually only attempted on the last play of a game (though some opportunists will do it on the last play of the first half), buy cheap Clonazepam no rx. It now applies to any desperate move by a losing team, Buy Clonazepam online no prescription, particularly in politics.

It's Not Over 'Til The Fat Lady Sings: This is an old phrase referring to operas that end with a fat woman singing. Sportscasters say "it's not over 'til the fat lady sings" to encourage viewers to keep watching in case the losing team stages a comeback, Clonazepam samples. Clonazepam For Sale, Other sportscasters prefer Yogi Berra's statement of the obvious, "It ain't over till it's over." Considering that most Americans in 2008 have never seen an opera, and would have to be forced at gunpoint to attend one, this particular expression will probably soon hear fat ladies singing its own death knell.

15 Minutes of Fame: In 1968, Order Clonazepam online c.o.d, American artist Andy Warhol said, "In the future, everyone will be world-famous for 15 minutes." He was close: with YouTube, online buy Clonazepam without a prescription, everyone is famous for approximately 3-5 minutes. Buy cheap Clonazepam, (See Miss South Carolina...)

Voted Off The Island: On the TV show "Survivor", contestants live and compete on a deserted island. At the end of every episode, order Clonazepam, one contestant is voted out by the others and sent home a loser. Where can i buy cheapest Clonazepam online, Oddly, this is highly entertaining. Hence, "voted off the island" means getting kicked out of a group or company, Clonazepam For Sale.

Jump The Shark: My favorite expression also has roots in television, where can i buy Clonazepam online. "Jump The Shark" refers to a laughably bad episode of the once-hit TV series "Happy Days" in which a character decides to waterski over live sharks. Clonazepam price, Since this show was supposedly about ordinary people in the 1950s, the absurd plot was a sign that the writers had officially run out of ideas. Now, australia, uk, us, usa, canada, mexico, india, craiglist, ebay, whenever a TV show or an actor's career declines, people speculate on the exact moment -- usually the most embarrassing one -- where they "jumped the shark." The phrase is also applied to Presidential candidates, but fortunately, not to bloggers... yet.

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Alprazolam For Sale, As a USC Trojan, I have a twisted interest in the Ohio State University football team this season. I was thrilled when my Trojans throttled them earlier this season 35-3, buy Alprazolam online cod, Where can i buy Alprazolam online, but this weekend, I'll be rooting for the Buckeyes as they play Penn State, buy Alprazolam online no prescription. Alprazolam over the counter, (Penn State is ranked higher than USC, and therefore must be vanquished.) Will Ohio State win, order Alprazolam online c.o.d. Alprazolam samples, No idea. But I can make one prediction with 100% certainty.., where can i order Alprazolam without prescription. At least one Ohio State player on TV will call his school "The Ohio State University" -- with an emphasis on the "The." I hear that's the official name of the school, but no one outside of Ohio calls it that, Alprazolam For Sale. Online buying Alprazolam, And I haven't heard players from Penn State or Oregon State or Any Other State pump up a "The" before their school name. It doesn't bother me that they do that -- it's kind of amusing -- but the emphasis implies that there's a copycat school out there calling itself "Ohio State University" and that's pissing off the original, buy generic Alprazolam. Purchase Alprazolam online no prescription, To be fair, I can't explain why schools whose names start with the word "University" automatically get preceded by a "The" -- as in "the University of Southern California" -- but those that start with state names don't, purchase Alprazolam online. Buy Alprazolam without prescription, Also inexplicable: when the University of Southern California is shortened to "USC," the "The" disappears, buy Alprazolam no prescription, Order Alprazolam no prescription, but we still use "The" before both "American Civil Liberties Union" and "ACLU"... Alprazolam For Sale, Ah, you're nodding off. You can tell I'm not obsessed with readership figures when I devote an entire article to a preposition, buy Alprazolam from mexico. Alprazolam for sale, So I'll get to my point...

The reason I bring "The" up in a marketing blog is that it seems to confound companies when it comes to naming their products, where can i buy cheapest Alprazolam online. Buy Alprazolam from canada, As a copywriter at Saatchi & Saatchi, I used to disagree with the power dweebs over at Toyota who insisted on dropping all prepositions in front of car names, buy cheap Alprazolam no rx. They would have hissyfits if you put an "a" or a "the" in front of Camry, Tundra, Corolla and the rest of their lineup, Alprazolam For Sale. Buy cheap Alprazolam no rx, We were expected to talk about their cars as if they were people: "Drive Camry today!" "Check out Tundra!" "Been inside Corolla?" The problem is that no consumers or even salespeople speak that way...

"Hey, purchase Alprazolam online no prescription, Buy Alprazolam from mexico, Bob, what kind of car do you have?""I own Land Cruiser.""Could I interest you in Escalade?"

Speaking that way makes you sound like a unitard or a certain California governor with an Austrian accent, Alprazolam from canadian pharmacy. Buy Alprazolam online cod, Today, while reading another witty car review by the brilliant Dan Neil, online buy Alprazolam without a prescription, Australia, uk, us, usa, canada, mexico, india, craiglist, ebay, I noticed that he uses prepositions before car names. And who's to argue with a Pulitzer Prize winner, order Alprazolam online c.o.d.

So here's one of the rules of naming: Alprazolam For Sale, Unless being bizarre is your objective, go with what sounds natural, otherwise your marketing will clash with real world usage. Coca-Cola is one of the greatest brands in history, and they don't insist on treating their products as people. Buy Alprazolam from canada, (Of course, maybe it's because if someone were to say "give me Coke" at a restaurant, Alprazolam pharmacy, Where can i buy cheapest Alprazolam online, they'd get gang-tackled by a nearby DEA team.)

Imposing odd prepositional rules on the general public is a recipe for confusion.

That said, I'm off to drive Maxima to the Starbucks to pick up Venti Latte. Go the Buckeyes.

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October 24th, 2008 · 1 Comment · How To Tips, Random Observations

[caption id="attachment_558" align="alignleft" width="204" caption="Want proof?"] Buy Nordiazepam Without Prescription, [/caption]

So there's this common symbol that's being used to justify everything from industrial pollution to obscene spending. No, I'm not talking about the letter "W" -- that's become a punchline, buy no prescription Nordiazepam online. I'm referring to the once humble and inoffensive % sign, Buy Nordiazepam without a prescription, now exploited as a tool of self-righteous justification. I stumbled across two flagrant examples of % abuse in the past few days alone...

The first was at my friend Patrick Byers' Responsible Marketing Blog, buy Nordiazepam without prescription, where he intelligently analyzed the wastefulness of phonebooks, Order Nordiazepam, which most people use to keep their kitchen counters from floating away. In response to the criticism, a spokestool from the Yellow Pages Association argued that phonebooks account for less than 0.3% of the waste stream, Buy Nordiazepam Without Prescription.

Now, that 0.3% is a dinky, buy generic Nordiazepam, almost microscopic number, Buy Nordiazepam online no prescription, right. Except we're talking the USA here: the worldwide leader in garbage production. America's total non-hazardous waste production in 2006 came to 502, buy Nordiazepam no prescription,000, Nordiazepam samples, 000,000 pounds -- and that was before the McCain campaign started printing flyers. What's 0.3% of that, where can i order Nordiazepam without prescription. Buy Nordiazepam Without Prescription, Oh, only 1,506,000,000 pounds, which is arguably one hell of a lot of yellow paper. It's also close to the estimate provided by phonebook critics Yellowpagesgoesgreen.org:

To produce 500 million books:

19 million trees need to be harvested

1.6 billion pounds of paper are wasted

7.2 million barrels of oil are misspent in their processing (not including the wasted gas used for their delivery to your doorstep)

268, Where can i find Nordiazepam online, 000 cubic yards of landfill are taken up

3.2 billion kilowatt hours of electricity are squandered

Our Yellow Pages Association spokestool claims that those figures "can't be verified," but by using a more useful tool -- a calculator -- we can see that these numbers aren't far from what the Association is itself claiming.

Then there's Sarah Palin's little shopping spree paid for by the Republican National Committee, Nordiazepam price. One commenter on a blog defended the six-figure feeding frenzy as totaling less than 2% of the $84, Nordiazepam over the counter, 000,000 McCain is allowed to spend on his campaign. It's an even smaller % if you throw in the RNC budget, online buying Nordiazepam. But in this case, the tactic just isn't working, Buy Nordiazepam Without Prescription. Most people are only seeing the price tag: $150, Order Nordiazepam from mexican pharmacy, 000... nearly four times the average American income... spent in one month.., buy cheap Nordiazepam. during a worldwide economic downturn. Buy Nordiazepam Without Prescription, That kind of raw steaming reality simply annihilates whatever % is being flaunted by the defense. Rx free Nordiazepam, That said, the % symbol is still a fun and occasionally effective way to dispel the shock and awe of seemingly big numbers. The $700, purchase Nordiazepam online,000, Order Nordiazepam no prescription, 000,000 Wall Street bailout. Well, Nordiazepam for sale, that's only 5% of America's $13, Where can i buy Nordiazepam online, 000,000,000, buy Nordiazepam from mexico,000 GDP. Nordiazepam price, Tom Cruise's $70,000,000 in earnings for "War of the Worlds", order Nordiazepam. That was based on a mere 20% of the film's profits, Buy Nordiazepam Without Prescription. Nice trick, Buy generic Nordiazepam, huh.

So now that you're aware of the power of the %, how can you get in on the act, where can i buy Nordiazepam online. Consider the big scary numbers in your life or business, Nordiazepam for sale, and compare them to even bigger, scarier numbers that may or may not be related...

Example 1: You owe $20, buy Nordiazepam online cod,000 in overdue student loans to the sharks at Sallie Mae. Buy Nordiazepam Without Prescription, When they call to harass you about paying it, just say, "Dude, that's only 0.0000125% of your $160,000,000,000 student loan portfolio, so give me a break!" (Just make sure you don't say that to any guy named Guido.)
Example 2: You and your spouse jointly make $40,000 per year, and you want to replace your perfectly good iPod with the totally cool new $399 second generation 32GB iPod Touch. Buy Nordiazepam from canada, Tell your skeptical significant other, "But honey, this second generation 32GB iPod Touch will make me really happy for less than 1% of our annual income!"
Example 3: You want to charge a client $60, order Nordiazepam from mexican pharmacy,000 to create an online video for them. Where can i buy cheapest Nordiazepam online, You can argue, "Hey, I know that sounds like a lot, but it's only 85% of the cost of a one-page ad in one issue of Wired magazine, just 30% of the choreography budget for Will Smith's video 'Miami,' and a mere 0.09% of what Tom Cruise made for 'War of the Worlds.'"

Oops, I think I just gave away one of my sales tactics. Oh, well, that just demonstrates the total transparency you'll always find here at Cool Rules Pronto, my friends. And I mean that 110%...

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September 21st, 2008 · 4 Comments · Random Observations

Buy ProSom Without Prescription, [caption id="attachment_389" align="alignright" width="210" caption="Bill Lumbergh, American Hero, by SirWilly77"][/caption]

As yet another Cool Rules Pronto public service, I've identified a few words and phrases that have been so overused, misused and abused that they no longer have any meaning. (Kind of like the joke in an average Saturday Night Live sketch.) These terms sound important without saying anything, Order ProSom no prescription, which makes them ideal for press releases and political speeches...

Note: I have not included all the jargon that bugs me, such as "best of breed" in reference to non-animals, buy cheap ProSom no rx. That's because some jargon still conveys meaning, Where can i find ProSom online, even if hearing it feels like a rusty file is being scraped over my frontal lobe. This list also excludes annoying slang, such as "bling" (calling jewelry "bling" is like calling a train a "choo choo"), buy ProSom online no prescription, because most slang terms eventually die, ProSom for sale, particularly when middle-aged white people start using them.

That said, here are a few Words Sucked Dry in no particular order:

1, Buy ProSom Without Prescription. Mission Critical: This once referred to anything that was vital for the fulfillment of a company's primary activities, such as a fire truck being a "mission critical" element of a firefighting unit, buy no prescription ProSom online. Now it's applied to pretty much anything one company wants to sell to another. Australia, uk, us, usa, canada, mexico, india, craiglist, ebay, Desk-pad calendars. Why, they're mission critical, buy ProSom from mexico, because without them, Online buying ProSom, how can you keep track of vital lunch dates?. Buy ProSom Without Prescription, It's also applied to anything a manager wants to do that's not part of his job description: "I have a mission critical lunch date with the hot new girl -- I mean, junior executive -- in accounting..." The term "mission critical" now simply means "business related" -- at best.

2. Unparalleled: I learned this one at MCA Records when I had to write biographies for artists with rather uninteresting backgrounds, online buy ProSom without a prescription. I simply wrote that so-and-so has an "unparalleled" background in music, Where can i buy ProSom online, or had taken an "unparalleled" path to the top. Literally, "unparalleled" means "having no equal or match, purchase ProSom online," which means "different." And if the best you can say about something is that it's different, ProSom samples, that's not really saying much.

3, Buy ProSom Without Prescription. World Class: One of the worst car commercials of the past 20 years was the one introducing Daihatsu to America. It featured industrial video clips of an assembly plant with a voiceover straight out of a 1960's elementary-school science film describing Daihatsu as "world class." That essentially killed the term right then and there, ProSom over the counter, since it was applied to a small cheap car with a tiny engine and about as much sex appeal as Karl Rove in a unitard. Buy ProSom from canada, (My apologies for putting that image in your head.) Not surprisingly, the brand lasted all of four years in the U.S. (though I do see that the cars are now cuter and hipper, buy ProSom without prescription, just no longer available Stateside). Buy ProSom Without Prescription, Literally, "world class" refers to any product that can compete in the international marketplace. Order ProSom online c.o.d, But since most consumer products in today's America are imports, isn't everything "world class".

4, order ProSom from mexican pharmacy. Hero: I know this word has sentimental value to a lot of people, Buy ProSom without a prescription, and I don't wish to offend anyone who has genuinely done something heroic. However, when the term is applied to Olympic teams or a multi-million dollar baseball player who hits a walk-off home run, ProSom from canadian pharmacy, I'm afraid it loses all credibility. "Great athletes", Buy ProSom Without Prescription. Buy generic ProSom, Certainly. "Sources of inspiration". Perhaps, buy ProSom online cod. "Heroes -- just like all those people who risk their lives to save the lives of others". Buy ProSom Without Prescription, Uh, not so much. ProSom pharmacy, I believe a hero actually has to help someone at great risk to themselves -- simply joining the military isn't enough. The worst examples of hero abuse come from the business world: just now I Googled "hero" in the news category and got this... "Henry Paulson hailed as a hero for stemming market slide..." Oh, where can i buy cheapest ProSom online, hell no. Purchase ProSom online no prescription, Throw in the hit TV series "Heroes" and the hit video game "Guitar Hero," and the word has completely burnt out. Indeed, it's ripe for ridicule, as my frequent collaborator Dane Boedigheimer has done in this video:

5, Buy ProSom Without Prescription. Executive Experience: Don't get me started on this one, where can i order ProSom without prescription.

6. Rx free ProSom, Revolutionary: A term used for everything from Web 2.0 startups to razor blades. Unless you're changing the way an entire industry operates like iTunes, you're about as revolutionary as a new pancake topping at IHOP, buy ProSom no prescription.

Buy ProSom Without Prescription, 7. Leader/Leading: I already skewered this in "How (Not) To Write A Press Release." Briefly, Order ProSom, every company in the universe describes itself as a "leader" or a "leading provider," even if they just started up yesterday. But if everyone's a leader, rx free ProSom, then who are the followers. A "leading" company should actually be leading its rivals into some new practice or technology. The Toyota Prius. Definitely a leader, Buy ProSom Without Prescription. The Hyundai anything outside of Korea. No. A genuine leader should also actually rank near the top of their industry according to some criteria, like revenue, or amount of taxpayer dollars needed to bail it out. This word is dead -- time to think of others.

Buy ProSom Without Prescription, 8. Cool: Finally, "cool" as a business term has been dead and tired for decades, but businesses are still using it to describe anything they want to sell to young people. "Check out our cool back-to-school fashions" or "we've got cool electronics" or "are you looking for cool lunch meats?" Note: If you call yourself "cool," you're not.... unless, of course, you're using the word ironically or as a pop-culture reference in the title of your, um, blog.

OK, I've had my rant. Now it's your turn, Buy ProSom Without Prescription. Got your favorite burnt-out business terms. Please fill me in.

Related Articles:

Soccer Moms Voted Off The Island For Jumping The Shark: 10 Odd American Expressions You Should Know

Anarchy in the U.K.. Or Just Getting Their Ducks In A Row

Update 10/27/8: Patrick Byers has written a post on annoying jargon at his Responsible Marketing Blog. It includes a handy list of terms that will help you annoy your officemates and get you promoted to middle management.

Entries Tagged as 'communications'

Buy Cloxazolam Without Prescription

August 15th, 2009 · No Comments · Uncategorized

Clonazepam For Sale

October 28th, 2008 · 2 Comments · Random Observations

Alprazolam For Sale

October 24th, 2008 · No Comments · How To Tips

Buy Nordiazepam Without Prescription

October 24th, 2008 · 1 Comment · How To Tips, Random Observations

Buy ProSom Without Prescription

September 21st, 2008 · 4 Comments · Random Observations

:::::: Cool Rules Pronto :::::: The Atomic Tango Blog

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Entries Tagged as 'communications'

Buy Cloxazolam Without Prescription

August 15th, 2009 · No Comments · Uncategorized

Clonazepam For Sale

October 28th, 2008 · 2 Comments · Random Observations

Alprazolam For Sale

October 24th, 2008 · No Comments · How To Tips

Buy Nordiazepam Without Prescription

October 24th, 2008 · 1 Comment · How To Tips, Random Observations

Buy ProSom Without Prescription

September 21st, 2008 · 4 Comments · Random Observations

:::::: Cool Rules Pronto :::::: The Atomic Tango Blog

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Click here to follow Atomic Tango on Twitter

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